15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good.

17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me.

18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.

19 For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do– this I keep on doing.

20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

21 So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me.

22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law;

23 but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members.

24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?

After church this morning, I thought about the passage I always think about when I feel like I’ve let God down.  I’m frail and weak in spirit and I always find myself not following His will.

I wrote about this passage back in May of 2008.  I guess you can say that some things never change.  I am still at a place where I know in my heart that I should be doing God’s will but I am too weak to carry it out.

Verse 18 says:

18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.

If it is so, then why should I even try to do good?  If God’s grace is going to keep me from going to hell, why do I still feel guilty about the things that I do that is not of His will?

I have to rely on God’s grace because it simply means that Jesus died for my sins and that any sin that was committed, being committed and will be committed in the future have already been paid.  He died for it.

I just wish that I could be as pure and perfect as God wants me to be because He is perfect.

This is where the passage from James 5:16 comes to play.

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

So friends, let’s do just that.  Let’s pray for one another.

I’ve been watching way too much TV lately but it’s because we just bought a new house and I’m absolutely obsessed with home improvement shows. This place needs a lot of work and instead of spending all my waking hours online looking at Pottery Barn stuff and spending money I don’t have I’ve thought it to be more productive to watch DUY shows and whatnot to learn how to do things like tiling my own backplash. I love that there are so many great shows on my www.ExpertSatellite.com channels that do just that but you know, at the end of the day I’m going to have to wait a while before I add anything to this place because I am broke as a joke. I had no idea there were so many small things on top of the cost of the house that I had to incur so right now I’m pretty much stretched to the max and can’t even get any mustard for my sandwiches much less spring for a new couch. I love being a homeowner.

Yes, I am Catholic and still consider myself one even though the current Pope and I don’t see eye-to-eye.  In as much that I call myself Catholic, I am open to other religions as well.  I listen and I take the good things that I can get and keep them to guide me through my journey.

Back in the day, I used to watch a televised Sunday service at the Crystal Cathedral (a place where I had the great opportunity to visit while I lived in Los Angeles).  I was attracted to the service because of a wise man named Dr. Robert Schuller.  He had this great sense of joy that is totally contagious and every time I watched him, I felt like he just shared with me the light of Christ and I could feel joyful all throughout the week simply because of how he shared his joy with me.

One of the favorite moments in the service that I recall is his closing prayer.   It is so real and so sincere that I take the blessing in full so that I could feel the power of God inside me always.

I would like to share the closing/blessing prayer he gives each time the service is over.    I wish you all the same blessing.

Now, May the Lord Bless you and keep you. May He make His face shine upon you,  and be gracious unto you.  

And, may God give you, peace.  

In your going out and in your coming in.
In you lying down and in your rising up.

In your labor and in your leisure.

In your laughter and in your tears.

Until you come to stand before Jesus in that day in that day in which there is no sunset and no dawning. Only eternal light and life forever more,

Amen.

As someone who loves to travel, I have been very lucky. I have been to much of Europe and Asia, and have also lived in several cities in North America.

I travel mostly on vacation but I did have an opportunity to travel for work. The best place for me has been Brazil and I have gone to Brazil every year since I visited in 2009. I was planning on going again this year but I may have to put off my plans because the airfare this year have gone through the roof.

So, in place of going international, I would like to explore more local spots.  I have lived in New York City but I wasn’t much into the gay scene while I lived there.  I wasn’t out yet.   I have always wanted to visit the San Francisco, Castro Area and maybe that’s what I will do this year instead.  Besides, the hassles of coming in from a foreign country back to the US has gotten old for me.  I always get stopped by Immigration every time I come in (something to do with the random list) and I am tired of it.

If you are gay however, you probably would like to check out places that are gay-friendly.  First of all, I would suggest that you stay at Gay Friendly Hotels as opposed to randomly selecting any cheap hotel that you find.

There is a great gay travel blog you can visit that provides real experiences from gay-friendly places on your travel wish list.  The blog is called Gay Travel Buddy and the blogger reviews cities, gay bars, restaurants, and hotels he personally visited.  It’s a great way to find out information about the places you want to visit without spending money (or wasting money) at a place you probably wouldn’t have been to if you knew more about it.

The site is kinda slow so you have to bear with it.  There’s a list of cities you can click on which includes a few international cities as well.

As for my vacation plans this year, I probably will do weekend trips to Washington, DC, New York City, and possibly Rehoboth Beach, DE in the summer.   That is if the fares to Brazil don’t come down before June.  But if it does – - – Sao Paulo, here I come!

I am coming to blog about this very late in the game because I wasn’t sure whether what I initially felt while watching the video (Why I Hate Religion but Love Jesus) was the way that I should feel. Jefferson Bethke posted a Youtube video on 01/10/2012 and within a couple of days, the number of views reached millions. As of this writing, the video has garnered over 12 million views and it continues to climb.

When he opened the poem with “What if I told you that Jesus came to abolish religion”, I didn’t hear it. I somehow got caught in the poem after that. When he continued on, I felt the sincerity of what he was trying to say and the message I got in the end is that I am loved by Jesus regardless of what I have done, doing and will do in the future. That’s when I cried.

I have always known that but with Jefferson’s delivery and how he said “I WANT THAT MAN”, I literally saw visions of God pointing at me saying that He wants me.

But after I saw the video a gazillion times, I began to actually listen to the words. When I heard him say that Jesus came to abolish religion – - I had to think again. “Did he just say that?” Because in all my years of studying the bible, one very distinct phrase I remember Jesus saying is this:

“Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them. – Matthew 5:17

Although I agreed with Jefferson’s message, I sincerely hope that he is not misleading people who’ve seen the video and take his words as fact. Because if you look it up, Jesus DID NOT come to abolish the law.

I still believe that Jefferson’s message is one that has to be proclaimed. One special part that touched me was when he said that the Church is not a museum for good people, but a hospital for the broken. I agree with that wholeheartedly. It’s the most powerful part of his message. The church, being the bride of Christ should accept ALL people.

And when he said, “The Son of God did not support self-righteousness; not now, not then” – I almost stood up to applaud him because it is true. Self-righteousness is really not how Jesus taught us to deal with others. James 4:10 states, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”

So, in total, I think Jefferson has the charisma and the power to preach. I do hope that he will rely on the bible for his facts before he spills it out as if they’re true. He is definitely gifted and he can deliver speeches and lectures well – - – he just has to be careful. He is a young and passionate kid and I must commend him for that. But it is easy to get caught up in things and I hope that his celebrity status doesn’t murky the waters that he’s trying to tread. (One interesting thing from his video is that a link to the watch company was provided below saying that it was the watch he was wearing on the video and if you’d like to purchase, to click the link. HUH? Sales?)

I went to Brazil in May and then in November, I was coerced to go to a Mediterranean cruise by a friend of mine.  No regrets here.  I had a great time on both trips but you know what that meant right?  I went over-budget.

So, in thinking about budgets for 2012,  I promised myself that I will only go on one international vacation.  The rest would be spent as weekend trips and day trips and also maybe, I can spend a week at home and do all the things that I’ve neglected to do.

One of the things at the top of my list that I decided to do this year is to create extra income using the power of blogging.  I have a few sites and I make decent amount in advertising.  They are a good supplement to my income and vacation expenditures.

If you want to monetize the traffic on your site or blog and there are many ways to do so.  You can earn from Pay Per Click advertising, you can accept full page advertising or even banner advertising.  Depending on the traffic that you have on your site or blog, you can earn as much or as little you want.

BizzClick LLP is one such company who can provide you a variety of tools that you can use to gain traffic on your site and / or monetize the traffic that you are already receiving.  If you want to advertise your site to attract more visitors, they can help you with that as well.  They have 24/7 support and if you can accept payment in many acceptable payment systems such as Paypal, Webmoney, Western Union and so forth.

I am looking at every single possible way I can earn a little extra income and if I can do it through my blogs, so can you.

If  you’d like to give it a try, you may visit BizzClick LLP and check them out.

Here are the links:

Home page

Advertiser page

Publisher page

We just installed a Home Security Family system in our home. Now, I feel much safer when I am home alone. My husband has recently started working the night shift. I feel like I hear everything that goes bump in the night. Any little creak or noise will startle me. For a while, I was tossing and turning. I was getting hardly any sleep. It made for a very stressful day at work. I would sleep with the lights and television on. After I got the alarm system, by suggestion of my mother in law, I started sleeping better. My father in law is a surgeon and worked a lot of nights. She said that she was in the same situation when they first got married. She said that she would toss and turn and was totally exhausted when she worked as a nurse during the day. I really got to the point where I couldn’t afford to loose anymore sleep. It was fraying me at both ends and I was having all sort of problems. I was getting sick and wasn’t able to focus. Now, I’m back and work and back on track. I wish I had gotten an alarm sooner.

It is one of the most celebrated holidays in the Christian calendar:  The birth of Christ being celebrated on the 25th of December.  I’m not going to get into a debate with other people telling me that Jesus wasn’t really born on December 25th and so on and so forth.  I know that as a Christian, I celebrate the birth of my Savior and it doesn’t matter really what day is designated to celebrate it.

During the holiday Season of Advent, similar to the Season of Lent, Christians from around the world try to be at their best behavior.  It’s a time to pay respect to our risen Savior.    Jesus Christ came and died for us to set us free.

This year Christmas day was the first time I have ever celebrated Christmas alone.  I spend the day at home, recovering from an operation performed on me a week prior.   It gave me time to reflect and I was glad I had spent it alone.

Christmas to most people is a time to rush, a time to give, a time to shop, a time to bake, a time to cook, a time to remember.  All of those things I had to forget this year because being confined to a bed a week before Christmas means I can’t do much.  I can’t go shopping for gifts, I can’t write Christmas cards to send out and rush to the post office, I can’t cook anything.  The only thing I was able to do was to remember.

I remembered the days when my parents were still alive.  I remember how joyous our Christmases were when they were here.  There’s something about them being present that made Christmas gatherings more worthwhile for the family.   Since they passed, it is very rare that we get the complete family together in one place.  Everyone seems to have an excuse.

So, what I did was remember the good old Christmas past that we had.   I remembered the time when my nephews and nieces were very young and we had them re-enact the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem.  I had a newborn niece back then and she was the baby Jesus.  I think we actually have it on video.  Imagine when one of my nephews playing the role of a Magi yells and screams, “The star! The star!!”   It was hilarious.

Those kids are married and have their own kids now too but it was fun to remember the time when everything was pure and innocent.   Our parents were the bond that kept us all together.

I do hope that in the coming years, our family will be able to take the time to get together on special holidays like Christmas so that we can make memories for our children and our children’s children.  Because one thing that you can do when you’re tied to a bedpost due to an illness is ….. remember.

I am a big fan of Oprah – in case you haven’t noticed.  I think she’s made a difference in the world we live in today.  Since her show ended, I found myself tuning to OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network) when she launched her Oprah’s Life Class series.

I watched a portion about forgiveness on her Life Class series. It’s about clearing out obstacles in your life in order that you may be able to fulfill your full potential.  I never realized how much holding a grudge can set you back in your journey to becoming a better person.

I have been in a rift with a few of my friends recently because of certain events that rattled the dynamics of our group.  We are a group of about thirty friends living in the same area.  When a group is that big, you know that you’re bound to have an argument or two with some of them.

I am not going to go into details as to what event I referred to because I think at this point, it is insignificant.  The lesson I learned from this journey is that sometimes, even when you feel that you are right, you should simply humble yourself and forgive the person you hold a grudge against.  It’s following the simple and golden rule of life – “Do unto others what you would have them do unto you.” – - or better yet, Newton’s Third Law of Motion – “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.”

After that certain event, I found myself pulling away from my friends simply because I didn’t want to create more drama than what is already there.  I tried to stay low and outside the radar just so that I can avoid further complications to our group relationships.  I didn’t speak to a couple of people in the group because I thought it would be best to just avoid them.  I was hurt by their actions in the past and I told myself, “Sometimes, you just have to stand your ground remove the negativity around you.”  And since I’ve said that, I thought I was giving myself a way out.   I didn’t have to interact with them or do I have to speak to them in hypocrisy.

As time went by, I noticed myself becoming more distant to all my friends.  Even the ones whom I didn’t have any issue with were pulling away from me.  I had become the negativity in their life because I am the one who kept on avoiding all of them at gatherings, parties and social settings.

Then, I realized that my unforgiving attitude toward two people in our group had become a hindrance to my own peace and ability to move forward.  It had stopped me dead in my tracks.  I was feeling lonelier and have grown apart from the friendships I once enjoyed.

This isolation have transferred over to my work life. I was more miserable, easily irritated and unmotivated.

So, last weekend I decided to forgive.  I decided to clear out the blockage in my own path.  I spoke to one of them and explained why I was offended by him and that I only stayed away from him so that he can realize that what he did to me was hurtful and that I was offended by it.  I also told him that I thought of him as someone who is better than that moment that he offended me.  I forgave him.

Instantly, I felt freedom.  I felt as if a weight has been lifted off of me.  I have more energy now to do the things I planned to do with my life.  I wanna re-create the story that I am involved in.  And hopefully, when the credits of life rolls at the end of my journey, I can easily say – I made the story better.

Have a great week folks!

I never thought that I would become a fan of ballet, or even one particular ballet. But you grow up, have kids and then things really change. We had three little girls and all of them took ballet. So it only became a natural decision to take them to The Nutcracker around Christmastime. We didn’t go every year, but we went often enough. I started to look forward to it, not only because I saw my girls’ faces light up when we went to it. But also because I started to genuinely enjoy it. Now my daughters have daughters and I decided that it would be nice for me to get them tickets so they could take them to see the ballet that we used to love going to see together.

As I was looking up some info on buying tickets, I saw some info on miracle ear hearing aids and decided to go in and get fitted with some.

I bought some tickets for the girls to go and see the play together while I watch the boys at home. I’d like to go with them, but I know that taking some rowdy young boys to see it won’t be fun for anyone so it’s better to stay at home and babysit them.